try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
BRING THE BAGELS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Text me some of your sweat
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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