Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize