I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Never joke about your clitoris.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
