Your dad touched me again.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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