To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
