I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
