Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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