Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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