is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
my sisters under your porch take her home
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend