Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
