So drunk, too bad you don't want this
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
