We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
