I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
