My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
