He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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