i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
