if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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