Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I just had sex on a roof
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
