I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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