I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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