Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Randomize
