Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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