Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
