I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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