btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize