my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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