Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
