she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize
