Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
