Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
