Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
