Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
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and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
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Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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