new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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