perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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