Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet