Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
You're breaking my sexual little heart
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.