Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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