I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize