I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
