By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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