why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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