He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That accounts for only three of the penises
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize