After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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