if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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