Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
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