I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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