get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize