white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
