You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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