is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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