he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
