Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
