I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
